I'm the Halloween version of Scrooge

The title of this blog pretty much says it all. Halloween as a kid was great fun. Halloween as non-Mom adult wasn't even too bad. But I gotta say, Halloween as a parent pretty much sucks!

Parties started last weekend. Parties are still going. Parties will take place all day tomorrow. Every day I explain to the girls that today is not the trick-or-treating day. We've been talking costumes for WEEKS. They will be tired long before we ever hit the trick-or-treating trail. I am, by nature, a "let's-make-it-at-home" type of parent when it comes to costumes. Unfortunately, the gazillion football and school and work events that in which we have been partaking have not really left ample time in the schedule to make costumes. Grant and I are making his costume. We went easy with the girls and they are "zipping" into their store-bought costumes.

And then there is the whole candy thing. We teach our children not to ask strangers for candy, and not even to ask people they know for gifts. And then we tell them that Halloween is exempt. Go ahead, kids.............dress up in a costume and its okay to to knock on people's doors and expect them to give you candy! And does anyone's kids really eat that candy? Our sits around for weeks, we eat the stuff we like, and finally dump the rest in the garbage. We have the additional problem that we only trick-or-treat with families we know. Many of the stops along the way involve grandparents or elderly people that don't get many trick-or-treaters, so they all have something "special" set aside for our children. Our kids are likely to come home with BIG candy bars, toys, cans of pop, and possibly even some cash. Not kidding here!! I trick-or-treated the same neighborhood as a child and one house was famous for giving silver dollars!!! And remember, we live in a rural area, so trick-or-treating is a driving from house to house event. No walking here!!

Before I was a parent, I knew a Mom that actually told her kids to go home after trick-or-treating and eat ALL the candy they wanted. Sometimes, she said they ate until they barfed. But the kids knew that when they went to bed, whatever was left of the candy went in the garbage. At the time, I thought it was a bizarre concept. Looking back, I have to give her credit ... it was a way to bring an abrupt end to Halloween leftovers.

Tonight, we will carve our pumpkins at home. And then, tomorrow, we'll stuff little people into costumes, smile, and do the whole nine yards that is Halloween in America in 2007. I will congratulate children on their costumes and hand out candy. I will chat pleasantly with other parents. But if you happen to see me out trick-or-treating, know that behind the smile...........I'm hoping that Martha Freakin' Stewart chokes on her carameled apple.