Friday, January 02, 2009

Conversations for which I am ill-prepared

Tiersten is a very bright and observant 5 1/2 year old with a desire to be 15 yesterday. No matter how hard I try to keep her a little girl, I keep finding myself in conversations with her that SHE may be ready for.........but I am certainly not. Like yesterday.....

Walmart has a habit of putting the skimpy underwear right on the aisle. Walking by yesterday, Tiersten's eyes landed on a pair that, due to the way they were folded on the hanger, looked like little panties. The print on the fabric was something very cute-sie, and they caught her eye. So, of course, she picked them up. Turning to Jennica, who is hanging over the side of the cart, "Hey look, these are little panties!" She was correct on the "little" part, but what she meant was panties for her size, which they were definitely not. When she asked me if she could get them, I pointed out that they were actually for "bigger girls." She gave me a quizzical look, so I had to point out that the string sides were folded and clipped in the hanger, so they would actually be too big around to fit her.

And then the moment of truth.......she turned the hanger around. Immediately, the brow wrinkled up in puzzlement. The question was unavoidable. "Why don't these panties have a back?"

I took a deep breath and decided that an honest question deserves an honest answer. "Well.....that string part in the back is supposed to go in your crack."

Big grin here in response. "In your BOTTOM crack?"

I had come this far. "Yep. It's called a thong." I started to move the cart on down the aisle.

She quickly hung them back on the rack, she and Jennica shared a look of.......I don't know......sisterly humor maybe......and they both absolutely cracked up laughing. There were a few quiet comments exchanged between the two of them about bottom cracks, and more giggling, all of which I chose to pretend not to hear in an effort to let them work through their new information.

UGH! I am SO not ready for teenage daughters. Is there a class I can take before they get there? Actually, I might need more than one class.

1 comment:

Ann said...

This is hilarious! These are the kinds of conversations I have on a regular basis with my daughter! She's 11 now, but she's been, well, "curious" about the world forever.... have fun, that's all I can say!